Thanksgiving HAIKU!!!

Leaves

They fall from trees

make people sneeze

and turn colors in the breeze

Sticks

they flatten tires

hit Lizzie Mcguire

and keep me from getting hired

Stuffing

yummy yummy in my tummy

put it on my turkey with bread and cranbummy

oh what a sight it hurts my eyeballummys

Artificial Hip

As the old man approached my friends an me, we froze as we knew a beating was about to get thrown down. Barefoot and covered in peanut butter, I attacked the elderly man coming at him with all fours wailing in the air towards his face region. Using his only weapon; a flashlight, he uppercut me with tremendous force. Luckily, it didn't have any batteries, so it didn't hurt very bad. After about 7 seconds of fighting, my lungs gasping for air, and a stumped toe the size of an almond, I slapped my friends hand to come in. After all, this was a tag team fight. Screaming gibberish as his battle cry, my homie sprung into action an slipper popped that old man right on top of his foot. "Yeow ouchy oh ouchy oh ouchy oh gloot that hurty oh hurty oh hurty my foot," the old man yelled as his foot was on fire from the slap. After that session, my other friend, (theres three of us) approached with the courage and swiftness of a ninja as he went supersaian on the elder on his bicycle!!!! But wait, his tire is flat!!! "Whoa whoa john doe" he screamed as he slid and collided with the old creatures hip. We thought the impact would cripple the old man just by snapping his hip, but NOOOOOO!!! He had just had a hip replacement and it was pure TITANIUM!!! The reflected force shot back into our eyes and we were temporarily "blinded by the light, revved up like a deuce another runner in the night." Yes, blinded by the light, by Manfred Man. It's quite a classic, but also besides the point. We were blinded by the light from his artificial appendage and fell to the ground. Then we left.

THE END!!!

POP-SYNDICATE

Sad Mr. Bear Cub Human Eater:(

Hello, my name is "Bear Cub Human Eater" the bear. This picture you are looking at is of me. Sad Mr. Bear Cub Human Eater with your big meaty claws. I'm super sad because some human that I ate on my brunch (between breakfast and lunch) gave me a tummy ache. It hurts Weely bad. Tummy aches always make me sad, so that explains the frown across my head region face area.

WHITE RAPPER

Oh when you had just turned 18

your new license picture was ugly

your hair was a big fro

and your life was goin down the road

your friends were all you had

except the ford ranger, its real bad

oh and your small dog daisy

but she poops on everything its crazy

Your wake up anytime,

barely make first period on time

gorge yourself for lunch,

then in football practice you'd get punched

soon after that the sun went kerplunk

after homework and supper your head started dreamin of junk

then waking the next morning youd do it again

only to waste your time doing the same plan

so basically thats all I could produce

I hope you enjoyed my rhyme because if you don't your heads goin in a noose

Coach Rhodes

My fondest memory of Coach Rhodes is seeing how happy he was when we ran at Austin my sophomore year. He was jumping and laughing when we won Regionals in the Sprint Relay. It made me so happy to see him like that and made me laugh too.

The Mountain Men

Once upon a time, in a far far land, there were two hobbits named Bert and Ernie. These two little men were raggedy fellows with long hair and even longer toenails. They ran through the woodlands like squirrels scampering on the forest floor.

One fine evening, Bert and Ernie were climbing a willow tree when they looked over and spotted something. Through the trees, in a distant view, was a mountain. These two had never seen such a creation. They had been in the forest for so long that they weren't quite sure how to take in the sight. So they stared at it for a moment, and decided that they would make a journey to the far away land. After climbing down from the willow, they departed back to there village to debate when and how they would go on this new adventure.

Gathering bread and water, a blanket and there toenail clippers, they were finally prepared for the intense excursion they were about to endure. After a couple of hours of walking and hiking and walking and hiking and walking, the two hobbits were growing in excitement as they were becoming closer to there new find. Another two weeks passed by, and the two mend were out of food and water, there toenail clippers were dull, and they had began eating grass due to the fact they had lost 45 pounds a piece. That's not good because they only weighed about 90 pounds to begin with. Besides that, Bert and Ernie just knew they had to be somewhere close for they had been hiking for days and days. Just when they were about to turn back, the trees began to thin, turning into a meadow, and just over the plain was a tremendous hill. Such a large hill that it wasn't a hill at all. It was a mountain!! The two tiny hobbits began to jump for joy!! YAY YAY HIP HIP HORRAY!! They had finally reached there goal!! Or so they thought. They still needed to hike up the face of there find. So, just at they had began once, they set out again, hiking and climbing and hiking and climbing and hiking up up up up the tall mountain. Since grass didn't grow well on the mountain, they ate dirt and worms. This made them lose another 5 pounds. Not good for people who started out at 90 pounds. Then, all of a sudden, there faces began to warm, there eyes closed as they knew where they were. They stepped to the very top of the mountain. They really had reached there final goal. Sadly, they were stupid enough to keep there eyes closed. They were so overjoyed that that kept walking and fell off the mountain on the other side and died.

It's okay though, this story was fake anyways.

PIG VIRUS

The swine flu, or H1N1, has "taken over" some people say. It has killed hundreds since the outbreak first began, but the swine flu, I think, is just another new sickness that just happens to have the media thinking its an epidemic thats going to end the world. Just look at the numbers; swine flu has killed roughly 150 people in Mexico while the number in the U.S. is nowhere near that amount. The regular flue kills 36,000 people every year. In the United States alone! So I think that H1N1 is just another new sickness that needs to settle in I guess you could say.

Seth's Poem

Seth

Funny, Athletic, Happy, Outgoing, Entertaining

Food, Motorcycles, Laci

Mommy, Daddy, Sister, Daisy Mae (my dog)

Smacking & Slow people

Time Travelers Wife, Last House on the Left, Lord of the Rings

Rhinoceroses & the dark

Senior period off, tad longer lunch, easy classes, barely any homework

France, Switzerland, Italy

Australia, California, Japan, Hawaii, Cancun

A degree in something, good family, job,

Simpson

Beowulf

The Wrath of Grendel; A powerful monster, living down in the darkness, growled in pain, impatient as day after day the music rang loud in that hall. The king had his iPod on full blast. So one night, Grendel made his way up to Herot to unleash his fury!!! As he headed out, he equipped himself with his favorite tool; his handy dandy BLENDER. Once he arrived at the gate, he saw dozens of drunken soldiers, passed out on the ground. As his mouth began to water, he snatched 30 of the men up and tossed them strait into the blender. Grendel, starvin' like Marvin, pushed the "human" button and watched the men get ground into a reddish fleshy slushy mixture. Once they were all mixed up, he guzzled them down. He even put some whip cream on top to make them extra creamy!!! Then, just as fast as he arrived, Grendel was gone. Just like that. Whoosh.

The Coming of Beowulf; In his far-off home Beowulf, follower of Higlac, quickly commanded a boat fitted with himself, and the strongest of the Geats. Higlac, had just saved a bunch of money on his car insurance by switching to Geiko, so he went out and bought a Blackberry storm with the Verizon network. Besides that, Beowulf and his men hopped in Beowulf's new yaght to sail the ocean, and arrive on shore at Herot. When they came upon the land they were met by a Danish Watchmen. The watchmen sprinted down the cliffside where he met Beowulf and his men. Watchmen: "whose soldiers are you?" He also explaine how he had guarded the cliffs for years, blah blah blah. Anyways, Beowulf answered: "We are Geats, men who follow Higlac." Those words were enough for the Watchmen to let the men pass. But just in case, he whipped out his Walkie-Talkie and hit up the king to let him know these "trespassers" were coming.

A lot of time later, Beowulf equipped himself with soldiers abroad to follow him to the nesting grounds of Grendel.

The Battle with Grendel; Out from the marsh, from the foot of misty hills and bogs, Grendel came, hoping to kill anyone he could trap on this trip to high Herot. He came into the castle, stopped, and saw the hall filled with sleeping warriors. He began to laugh as he took out his blender and plugged it into the nearby outlet on the wall. He snatched the first Geat he came to, ripped him apart, cut his body to bits with powerful jaws, drank the blood from his veins and bolted him down. He was so hungry he decided to skip man-smoothie on that round. Once he gobbled that man down, Grendel stepped to another still body, clutched at Beowulf with his claws, grasped at a strong-hearted wakeful sleeper-and was instantly seized himself, claws bent back as beowulf leaned up on one arm. Beowulf unleashed fury on Grendel's arm and ripped it clean off!!! In pain, Grendel fleed the castle running back to his marsh for safety.

Beowulf owes his strength to his Bowflex. He had trained for weeks before he came to Herot to obtain the Bowflex body he needed.

Beowulf and his men proudly sent Grendel back to his lair.

The Monsters' Lair; Grendel's mother is hidden in her terrible home, in a place you've not seen. Seek it, if you dare. Save us once more.

The Battle with Grendel's Mother; As his words ended, Beowulf leaped into the lake. For hours he sank through the waves; at last he saw the mud of the bottom. And all at once the greedy she-wolf who'd ruled those waters for half a hundred years discovered him, saw that a creature from above had come to explore the bottom of her wet world. She welcomed him in her claws, clutched at him savagely but could not harm him for his mail shirt was to tough, also, she had just painted her nails a crusty brown tone to match her teeth. Angry at her failure, Grendels mommy took out her last resort; her gold-plated oozy. But no, Beowulf's armor was bullet proof too.

After lots and lots of fighting, Beowulf saw a heavy sword hanging on the wall, hammered by ginants, strong and blessed with their magic, the best of all weapons but so massive that no ordinary man could lift its carved and decoratd length. he drew it from its scabbard, broke the chain on its hilt, and then, savage, now, angry and desparate, lifted it high over his head and struck with all the strength he had left, caught her in the neck and cut it through, broked bones and all. He just chopped her hideous face right off.

The wise od warriors who surronded Hrothgar, like him staring into the monsters' lake, saw the waves surging and blood spurting through. They spoke about Beowulf, and said that the hero had lost fame and his life at once, and would never return to the living. Sadly they jumped back into the Whitebeard's limo, and headed back to the castle.

Then, Beowulf sprouted from the water carrying Grendel's Moothers's head. Beowulf and all the townspeople rejoyced for he had beaten the nasty creatures.

Beowulf returned home and ruled the Geatland for fifty years. Then a dragon menaces his kingdom. Although he is an old man, beowulf determines to slay the beast.

The Last Battle; Beowulf said farewell to his followers and made way to where the dragon was located.

Soon, Beowulf came into contact with the dragon and became engulfed in flames from the nostrils of the beast. Watching from the distance, Beowulf's comrad's became scared and one in particular was so terrified, he paged the king to come pick him up. Only one decided to help Beowulf in his time of need; His name was Wiglaf. The brave soldier jumped on his mountain bike to try and save Beowulf from the dragons terror.

The Spoils; together wiglaf and beowulf kill the dragon, but the old king is mortally wounded. As a last request, Beowulf asks wiglaf to bring him the treasure that the dragon was guarding. Wiglaf obeyed orders and snatched the treasure up bringing it back to Beowulf.

The Farewell; Wiglaf denounces the soldiers who deserted Beowulf in his combat with the dragon. Then the Geates built the tower Beowulf requested. And then, twelve of the bravest Geats rode their horse around the tower, telling their sorrow, telling stories of their dead king and his greatness. The leader of them used his bullhorn to announce the tales so all could hear him. And so Beowulf's followers rode, mourning their beloved leader, crying that no better king had ever lived, no prince so mild, no man so open to his people, so deserving of praise.

As soon as a get out of school, high school and college, Ima hopefully end up in a big architectural corporation where everyone listens to muah. Im the boss and I call the shots.

After I make plenty of money doing my bossin' around, Ima settle down outside Lubbock, Tx in my two story, 6,000 square foot dream home. My hacienda is gonna set on my own estate complete with a go-cart track, mini-golf course, dirt-bike track, tennis and basketball courts, swimming pool equipped with slides and diving cliffs, very large hot tub, and a nice cozy field for my collection of equines.

I hope to have three kids, after I get settled in, and I will drive them around in one of three cars. Possibly four. Depends on what my wife wants. We will be sportin' the Dodge Megacab Diesel, the BMW x5 SUV, or escalade cuz Im not sure yet, or the really nice car Ima be drivin on my off days. Prolly an Astin Martin or somethin. Either way, my family is gonna be ridin clean everywhere we go.

Several more years down the road, after the kids have grown a tad older, we will begin to take our vacations. While the kids are still in school we wont go out of the country, but once they leave, my wife and I will begin our 5 year vacation plan where we will save moola for 5 years then travel, save money for 5 years then travel, etc. I think its a pretty good plan. But just incase we are super rich, we will just travel whenever we wanna.

Well other than going to the church my family went to when I was a wee little boy, I think I have my future set for the next twenty years.

"Who Packed my Parachute"

Six people who I consider have packed my parachute include; my mom and dad, my sister, my cousin, my youth minister, and my football tea as a whole. My mom has done so much for me I cant even begin where to start. Over the years she has made me lunch at the house and had it prepared just in time so I could get there to eat. She has helped me with projects and talked to teachers when I didn't even know it, all to help me out in the end. My mom has taken me to the doctor, even if I really didn't need to go, all to make sure my "boo-boo" was okay. She is the reason I am the way I am. Without her, Im just a regular kid.

Expectations of My Senior Year

Over the course of my senior year, I expect myself to keep my grades up and keep my teachers happy. I hope to finish everything I start, and pass everything the best I can.